again with the cats

This post is ’bout to be filled up with all sorts of screaming capital letters.

Last night I ran to Dollar General to pick up some refried beans for dinner, along with some cereal for the kids’ breakfasts and kitty food for all those animals living on our porch. When I walked out the door I saw THIS CAT under my Durango.

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That very kitty who only yesterday morning had willingly snuggled with Baby Chickadee in the morning and then fell asleep next to her in the afternoon.

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THAT KITTY.

How in the world did that kitty make it all the way across a busy street, deep into a parking lot and under my vehicle? By stowing away in the engine of my vehicle!

YOU GUYS.

That little kitty would not come to me. I called her name (which is now Dusty, but has been Smokey, Crookshanks, Penelope, Lemon, and a few others), rattled cat food, and chased her around that parking lot while hobbled over, carrying my purse and the shopping bags. FINALLY she came to me.

I AM SO GLAD THAT KITTY DID NOT DISAPPEAR. Or die. Man, I am so glad we still have that kitty. Baby Chickadee LOVES her kitty. She is always holding that gray little thing, carrying it around, forcing it to lie on her tummy and endure countless kisses and snuggles.

Kitties are hard work, y’all. I still think they’re worth all the hard work, but I’m not sure I can deal with many more catnappings or stowaways.

school

I’ve been sitting here for the last 15 minutes, looking for old first-day-of-school-posts, and I haven’t been able to find them. Except for this one from right before G started his first year of preschool. Ohheissocute.

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All of this time fighting our super slow internet tells me that I need to post more pics from their first days of school. These memories are important to me. So! Here are G and Little Missy as they enter the 4th and 3rd grades.

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the commercial that spoke to my daughter

Even though Little Missy’s joke repertoire revolves exclusively around bathroom humor (I wrote about it back in April¬†¬†and nothing has changed) and I get SO STINKIN’ TIRED OF IT that I will look her straight in the eye and tell her to cut it out already, the way she giggled at the below commercial was so adorable that I rewound the TV two times so that I could hear her giggle again.

And after that, SO HELP ME, I am done with the fart jokes.

all the cats

Back in April Neighbor Boy called on a Monday night and whispered, “Mrs. Vader is having kittens.”

(Mrs. Vader being the neighborhood stray that had been unofficially adopted by the children and later officially adopted by Neighbor Boy’s grandparents. The cat was initially thought to have been a boy and named “Darth Vader,” but when it was discovered that HE was actually a SHE, the name morphed into Mrs. Vader. And she was, at the very moment of Neighbor Boy’s phone call, having another litter of kittens.)

But see, Neighbor Boy whispered the exciting news, probably so that he didn’t disturb the mama cat, and I couldn’t understand him. I remember looking at the phone and, figuring he had pocket-dialed me, hung up the phone.

Most likely irritated with my hang-up and not wanting it to happen againAZZZZZZZZZZzzg [<-- A kitty just did that. Apparently he thought my post needed a little more flair. Also: foreshadowing!] Neighbor Boy ran down to our house and told the news to G and Little Missy in person.

G and Little Missy took off to Neighbor Boy’s grandparents’ house and got to witness the miracle of a slimy little kitten being pushed out of its mama. They were in love. So when three of the four kittens came up for adoption my kids begged Hubby and me with their big ol’ eyes and sweet pleadings to please please please PLEASE let them be ours!

But here’s the thing: we lose cats.

I am not going to list all the cats we have gone through at this house because not all of you know me in person and someone will find me hard-hearted and irresponsible. But I will give you a list of excuses.

We have two neighbors against us in our quest to keep kitties. One lives in the house directly behind ours. He has a thing for cats and feeds them on his back deck. We believe our kitties have joined his ever-growing herd.

The other neighbors live three houses down and hate kitties. They trap them and send them off with animal control. It’s possible a kitty of ours got caught by the cranky-pants ladies and we didn’t check with animal control in time.

So I talked to my kids about how kitties disappear from our house and we are always so sad. But no, they wanted those kitties and Hubby is a total pushover when it comes to his children and we now have three kitties who’ve stayed around since May. We think they might actually be here to stay.

The problem, though, is that they’re really cute. All kitties are really cute, of course, and ours fill that requirement. AND they’re really friendly. My friend Jayme was sitting on the steps across the street from our house with one of her friends and our kitties played around their legs all evening. Last week I came home to Little Missy’s kitty rubbing the leg of the pizza delivery man, who was delivering pizza next door.

This combination of cute + overly friendly has led to TWO catnappings. We got them back both times, but it was nerve-wracking and lots of prayers were prayed and Little Missy about lost her mind the second time.

So in order to not lose them again we are on our second round of collars (the first were too big on the teeny kitties’ necks; now we think they’ve grown enough that they’ll work) and we keep food and water on the porch practically at all times. Which means we are not only feeding our kitties, but we are feeding a mama kitty who had her five babies in our garage (+6), a white cat (+1), an orange-ish white cat (+1), and a striped cat (+1). That’s an additional nine cats. TWELVE cats for us.Whoa doggy.

But we’ll keep feeding them cuz our kids love their kitties and snuggle them and carry them around the house. Plus, look at these two little kitties keeping me company on the porch this morning! (Adorable cat pictures for those of you who actually read to the end of this ginormously long post about cats.)

 

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